The Next Contestant
by Mon Chardonneret
Summary: How many people can Yuuri 'flirt' with before Wolfram snaps? Will Yuuri realise how much he cares for Wolfram? Based around Nickleback's The Next Contestant. My 1st fic, be kind.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the KKM characters, although I'd really like Gwendal if anyone knows how to contact him…?

Anybody? No? Oh well, I don't own the song Next Contestant either that belongs to Nickleback… sigh the only thing

I own here is my poorly constructed plot line. Please review me and be kind this is my first Fanfic and I'd like

to know what people think.

--

The Next Contestant

--

--

Wolfram, Gunter and Conrart stood at the edge of a lake waiting for Yuuri to swim ashore. 'I hope that wimp is

wearing clothes this time.' Wolfram thought to himself, 'I'm not going to be the one to clean up Gunter's nose bleeds

again.'

"Hi guys, you got a towel or something there?" Yuuri called from the middle of the lake while wondering if The Great One

had anything better to do than to drop him into the alternate world in embarrassing situations, he had just finished

taking a bath and had leaned in to remove the plug when he had been sucked into a really cold lake wearing nothing but

a now soaking wet towel.

As predicted Gunter promptly handed over a towel before dropping to the ground nose pouring red rivulets, Conrart smiled

and asked how 'his majesty' was and Yuuri corrected his godfather tiredly, all objectively ignoring the visibly steaming

Wolfram.

xxx

I judge by what she's wearing,

Just how many heads I'm tearing,

Off of assholes coming onto her,

Each night seems like it's getting worse...

xxx

Wolfram sighed, Yuuri would never love him back, and the way today was going Wolfram would be hard pressed to even try to

woo his reluctant fiancée. Everyone seemed to have something to request of the 27th Demon King, from their daughter Greta

wanting praise for doing well in her studies (better than the wimp anyway), to Gunter's incessant droning of etiquette and

history lessons. Even big brother Gwendel had made a brief appearance, attempting to get Yuuri to work on paperwork for once.

Wolfram couldn't get a word in edgewise and decided instead to wait until bedtime to make an attempt to win Yuuri over, for

now he had to content himself with yelling and snapping at everyone (including Yuuri) so that he wouldn't tear everyone apart.

xxx

And I wish she'd take the night off,

So I don't have to fight off,

Every asshole coming onto her,

It happens every night she works...

xxx

Yuuri was exhausted by the time he got to bed, Wolfram already snoring away, he'd been gone a month, Shin Makoku time, and it

seemed that the work had been saved for him. To make matters worse Wolfram had been glaring at him the entire day, muttering

under his breath but otherwise ignoring him, he simply did not understand what he'd to aggravate the blonde but he was fearing

the time when he decided to express his anger. Yuuri himself was slightly angry, though he didn't totally understand why.

It had started when he found some letters requesting permission to court Lord Wolfram von Bielefeld, both men and women,

usually Gunter took care of such nonsense paperwork but it seemed that Yuuri's absence had made him sloppy.

xxx

They'll go and ask the DJ,

To find out just what would she say,

If they all tried coming on to her,

Don't they know it's never going to work?

xxx

The next night Gunter had planned a ball to celebrate Yuuri's return and to strengthen political bonds… Gunter did tend to go

on a bit. Anyway Yuuri was currently surrounded by grasping and lecherous Lords and Ladies of various nobility and although

Wolfram had tactically pointed out that they were only after one thing, four times in the last hour, Yuuri was still annoyingly

oblivious to their attempts to steal him away from Wolfram. Wolfram growled out another insult and rebelliously slurped his drink

as a pretty young thing refilled Yuuri's cup before her flirtatious smile withered under Wolfram's vicious glare. Wolfram forced

himself to stay seated and not make a public scene by flambéing the next person to make another suggestive comment, but was

consoled in the fact that he could take out his frustration on Yuuri later.

xxx

They think they'll get inside her,

With every drink they buy her,

As they all try coming on to her,

This time somebody's getting hurt...

xxx

Yuuri was amazed at just how much pain Gunter could put up with. Currently Wolfram had him pinned and was repeatedly slamming

Gunter's head into the floor of the ballroom, this being after Gunter had yet again latched himself onto Yuuri claiming undying

loyalty and love to his King and Wolfram snapped, along with the stem of his Champaign flute. Then in seemingly slow motion Wolfram,

ignoring his cut hand leapt over the table to attack Gunter. After shaking himself out of his stupor Yuuri stepped over to help

laying his hand on Wolfram's shoulder trying to talk him down praying silently that he wouldn't turn on him instead. Wolfram

coloured up at the contact and Gunter took the chance to limp away.

xxx

Is that your hand on my girlfriend?

Is that your hand?

I wish you'd do it again,

I'll watch you leave here limping...

I wish you'd do it again,

I'll watch you leave here limping...

There goes the next contestant...

xxx

After Wolfram started turning his anger on Yuuri, Conrad had discreetly ushered them out to one of the ballroom antechambers that

adjoined the main dance floors. Wolfram had then continued to rant at Yuuri, well up until Yuuri had finally, finally realized

that the anger he had felt the previous day had been the same as the anger Wolfram was currently spouting, and Yuuri was not so naïve

not to realize that that feeling was jealousy. Yuuri's mind drifted to focus on the blonde's lips and in what even Wolfram

would agree was a defiantly un-wimppy move, claimed said blonde's lips in a chaste kiss to halt the endless tirade of threats and

insults.

Wolfram's chain of thought was completely derailed as his wimpy fiancée kissed him at long last. Wolfram's only remaining thought

was so there goes the next contestant…

--


	2. PETITION TO SAVE LEMONS

Author's Note

The administrators of are as of June 4th going to be taking down Fics that have lemons or have extreme violence. Now I don't know about you but I think that's stupid. There are many wonderful fics that only have one or two lemons in them yet the plot itself is awesome! You can't just take down a 100,000+ word fic just because it has a lemon in a chapter that is only 1000 words long. Now I urge you all to read the petition below, sign it, and repost this to your own fics. Hopefully if we make enough noise everything will return to normal. Thank you.

Greetings to the fine folk that moderate our site.

Myself, along with many, have been writing and posting on your fine site for years now, some of the better examples of up and coming writers out there are now suddenly finding some of the stories we've come to love at risk of being removed without the chance to even rectify our errors.

For some, that means the permanent loss of a story. While I don't have anything that I believe violates your terms of use, there are those out there that are never able to recover a story in its original form, this is something I find to be almost worthy of a legal action, as while we cannot claim ownership of a character, the stories are OURS and simply destroying them is something that is inexcusable.

It's quite easy to simply add an MA rating, additional filters or even a simple requirement for a free membership to read the stories presented here, and would cut down on hateful anonymous reviews and posts at the same time, so I have to question as to why such a thing, in all this time, simply wasn't added.

If you're worried about falsification of a registration then have an appropriate disclaimer and then there can be no dispute, you took your steps and the PARENTS didn't monitor their children, if that is even your concern. If it is more of a personal view or desire then please at least let people know and give them a chance to remove a story that you and yours find offensive, most people on the site are actually rather cordial when it comes to such requests.

While I cannot say for sure if this letter will even reach those that may be willing to listen, of if it's more akin to a wide spectrum purge in preparation for something bigger, please understand that you are going to be losing a LARGE number of your writers, and thus your income from a lack of readers if there is not some level of action taken to help with this situation.

For those that may agree with this, please feel free to sign on and send this to the support server, maybe we can get some movement on this.

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	3. PETITION PART 2

Hey – Readers (No I'm not dead though not from Uni's lack of trying), earlier I posted a petition I had seen on several other stories. I want to reassure everyone that I have backed up all my stories and if they do block me here I have a mediaminer . org account under the same name and a ficwad account under ElricFanGirl which I will start posting under. I really don't want to leave fanfiction . net as the site is easy to use and attractively set out, the community is supportive and the review culture is stronger than other sites and archives. If you agree with the (what I've seen as) general consensus – being that they should have a rating (MA or X… etc) to cover lemons and other fics that aren't currently covered by their rules as of '02.

I suggest that everyone with an account and stories who support lemon writers; post the petition with their penname at the bottom, as a chapter in all their stories. I would go one further and suggest everyone who uses this site make an account (if you don't have one already) and post a story called

"(Your penname here) Supports all fanfiction"

into your favourite category - multiple categories if you can! - under the M rating!

As the only chapter simply write a message of support for lemon writers and any others who may find themselves shafted by the current ratings. Border your message with a spacer like so.

(Your Message Here)

As your summary for the story simply say : 'Save our stories, Save our site, Fanfiction writers unite!'

(Doctor Seuss or poet - I am not!)

Pass the message on – publish a story of support and together we can cover every fandom and show the moderators that lemons and other mature stories are supported by the users of this site and an increased or new rating is worthwhile!


End file.
